Smoking, who me? Eight months.

Published July 19, 2014 by Liz Ault

The day almost got away from me before I realized that I am now at 8 months without a cigarette touching lips, let alone the toxins reaching my lungs. Those months of feeling ill are far behind me (looking much more forward to holidays this year). Somewhere between 6 and 7 months I started calling myself a recovering smoker. Non-smoker sounds cool, but addiction never goes away. I AM A RECOVERING SMOKER. Have to buy myself or design for myself a patch or pin to wear with pride. $1400 saved; 9200 cancer sticks not smoked.

I’m sure I sound very silly to some who have never taken this journey – but this is HUGE! I have short periods of time that a thought, dream, smell, etc. will make me briefly think of just lighting one – to see what happens. Hell, I know what happens. 

Still not at the longest as a recovering smoker. I stopped when I was 4 months pregnant with my son in August of ’83. When he was 6 months moved from Omaha to St. Louis, and not much longer after was pregnant with my daughter. About the time I got pregnant with her I started working for a major company that still allowed smoking in the workplace. I hit almost the 2 yr mark. The last months of my second pregnancy, I dreamed about cancer sticks jumping over fences – who took out the sheep?? I realized that the second hand smoke (which I always pooh-poohed) was real. I was surrounded by smokers. My pores were being inundated with that second hand smoke. I took a pack of cigarettes to the hospital, and after I delivered my daughter, I lit up.

I’ve stated I’m a 40 year 2-pack a day former smoker. I did take some breaks, but each time I started again I increased the number per day. 

What I will say out loud (okay as a post) – I will never go down that road again. I’ve been going to the gym, and working with a trainer, since February (3 month gift to self). I will always be in early stages of COPD. I will always have difficulty breathing in hot or cold weather. Yard work will still be in 10-15 minute increments. And I won’t be able to park my car WAY down the parking lot and still breathe. But, I will work at the gym and at home. I will increase my endurance. With increased endurance, am building muscle, etc. to support the arthritis. 

I AM A RECOVERING SMOKER. I thank those who have read about this journey. I thank those who have prayed for me (keep those coming). I thank those who have shared with me that my journey has helped them try it one more time. For those who are taking this journey because they have read about mine, know I will pray for you also. And I am here for anyone who needs to talk their way through NOT lighting that cancer stick.

Next major date, will be 9 months. The time that nature has given us for new life…

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